Fragmentation Makes You Ill And This Keeps You There

In today’s solo episode with Dr. Alex Golden, she talks about what fragmentation is and illustrates what drives it to our physical body. She also talks about healing and how being disconnected with who we really are is the whole premise of our problems in life. In this episode, Dr. Alex also talks about building self trust and empowerment.

Listen to this episode as Dr. Alex talks about how we can get the results and impact we want and how to come to a position of power and internal power with the help of being whole and authentic and by having courage in life.

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Dr. Alex Golden

Hi there. Good morning, good afternoon, good evening, good night, wherever you’re listening to this in the world. Welcome. Welcome Dr. Alex here with you. Today we’re going to talk about fragmentation and I have a really cool story for you guys, about illustrating the point of what fragmentation and what drives it does to our physical body, I had such a cool experience with a client that illustrated this and I say this all the time, it’s just that this kind of immediate feedback before and after is the kind of thing we’re all looking for. Which is why, when one person has that kind of experience, many of us can learn from it. So even if you are listening along being like, “I want to have a cool experience.” Sit tight, because you’re gonna join in the transformation of this just by saying what’s possible. And that becomes really exciting. This has been such a cool reminder, and this is what I’m saying, I even do this for a living, it’s such a cool reminder to see a before and after that’s like, so clear, so decisive, and so clear that you can’t even argue against this. Alright, so we’re getting into all that. So this is for you. And this is common. So, chances are you fall into this category is that you are experiencing fragmentation, as the driver is many of your problems. Health problems, relationship problems, motherhood problems, entrepreneurship problems, career problems, financial problems. The root cause of that stuff is fragmentation of who we are. And we’re going to get into why that’s the case. But all of our problems then, if being healed is being hauled, then the opposite is true that fragmentation is the problem, the actual root problem that many of us are having. But the fragmentation just kicks up an active part of our life. At one point or another for you right now might be health for someone else, it might be finances, and then in a year, it might be flipped, right? So really, the whole premise of our problems is disconnection from who we are. And that makes a lot of sense, right? Because we are globally one thing and therefore we know root causes work like that. The truth is always the simplest version of the story. It’s the thing we can all agree on. And that’s why truths are always simple and foundational like that. And so that is why, if you’re listening on, you’re having the problem, I can guarantee you are thinking or doing the things that I’m going to list. Because from that fragmentation, you are experiencing one or more of these things. A, you feel like you’re spinning your wheels, you’re doing a bunch of stuff, you know what you want to happen, and you’re desperate to have it and it’s still not happening, and you feel like you’re doing stuff. Sometimes you might be doing all the right stuff, sometimes you go off the rails, but you’re doing stuff and you’re making an effort, and it just isn’t happening. Or it feels like life is always coming to knock you off this B. If you always feel like life is coming to knock you off, it’s like you kind of get your bearings, and all of a sudden you got to move, or this happens and it wipes out your finances or you get sick again, or your kid needs something or your partner does something or you break up, right? Or C, you’re constantly no matter what is happening, the conversation in your head whether things are going good or not, you’re always second guessing yourself. Is that the right thing for me? Do I and then the motions come with it. I don’t feel confident. I’m not sure if this is the right call for me or my family. I don’t know if this is gonna work out. It sounds good, but I’m not sure. And my guess is that when you’re listening, one or more, potentially all three are happening for you. And that is why I say if you have a problem in your life, it’s coming from fragmentation and you are doing one or more of these things, right? When that’s the case, we know we found the crux of the issue, right? That fragmentation, 

the lack of cohesiveness and who you are, and if your whole world aligns with that is then really where the bulk of our focus becomes. And a lot of times, this is where people get, and they even have these kind of thoughts, right? They say, man that, I don’t know if I’m super happy in this marriage, I don’t know, if I really love this job. It’s not really what I want to be doing. I don’t know why I yell at my kids more than three times a day, I don’t know why I post more than four times a week on my social media, my business has been plateaued for more than three months, six months a year. Right? All of these things are acknowledged to us by the time we are getting that confusion. By the time we’re second guessing, by the time we’re feeling like life is blowing us around, by the time we feel powerless to decide things. At that point, the fragmentation exists. And really, it’s almost impossible to grow up and exit childhood without developing and taking on and conditioning, some of that fragmentation. And just as a reminder, I say this all the time. It’s not our fault, what happened to us, but it is our responsibility to take ownership for handling it once it’s present and this is that where that conversation starts, right? The fragmentation could have happened. Okay, you have the problem that I said, and you’re probably doing one or more of the things I pointed out. So if you are identifying that this is where we say, “Okay, what the value I get from identifying the root cause problem is, I know what I’m trying to do, and I know the overall picture that I’m dealing with.” Because that becomes our North Star and that helps us focus through the confusion through the second guessing, because building the self trust, and the empowerment takes time. And we need to be able to see our life and see ourselves from the higher perspective that gets us to advancing who we are, and whether or not we’re actually getting the results that we want from life. And that takes us to part two of the title of this right, I said fragmentation makes you ill. And this maintains it, the this that I’m talking about that maintains it is lack of resources. Because what we’re saying is if healing, true healing at the soul level, where you love who you are, and you’re becoming more and you’re intentional in that transformation, and you are creating a life and a legacy that you love and feel a lot of pride for, that transformation, it requires resources, because when we feel fragmented, when we feel pulled apart, it’s because we’ve done that through coping strategies that says, I can’t handle this right now, this is too much. I’m not equipped for this. Let me parse it away. Let me kind of sweep it away so that I have my work life here. I have who I am in relationship here. This is how I fit into my family and community here. This is how my health is and everything’s kind of set apart. But then when we you start looking globally, that cohesiveness isn’t there. And that’s why things don’t feel that good, right? And resources say they essentially get us to move through the fragmentation and develop the support structures we need. That we have decided from a place of self awareness and knowing ourselves that these resources support that transformation. And they support us not only in getting us to the goal, but provide compassion and love for us as we go through that process. So we can have fragmentation, and then the maintaining it even though we’re trying really hard by focusing our attention on the wrong resources, or at least not focusing our attention on resources anyways. And this happens all the time. This is where people are stuck in their health. They feel frustrated. They feel guilty of what they did in the past. Oh, I did that in college. That’s why this is happening. I made these choices. This is what it is and oh, this doctor messed this up and that’s why right? And you start to build all of that and it can build that fragmentation. 

Getting resources, acknowledges that, “Hey, I am mad at myself. And I need emotional processing tools that work for me when I’m in despair, and I’m a puddle on the ground. And I have resources and tools that work for me when I’m angry, and I’m yelling at the sky, trying to figure out why life is like this, and why this happened to me.” Right? Or it’s thoughts that we have, how do we manage the habitual thoughts that we have? How do we unpack and begin to heal intrusive thoughts, worry, anxiety, depression, and begin to see ourselves from a more empowered, cohesive picture that allows us to continue to heal that fragmentation, while we are in the process of finding, developing and becoming well versed in the resources that we need. And that is a very different problem, if you are fragmented, and that means you’re broken, there is nowhere else to go with that. And that is why people, I can identify the problem for you, right? You don’t have the health you want, you don’t have the life that you want. And you’re doing all of these things that I listed, and you can self identify as it Yes, I have that whole thing going on. But understand that when you self identify as that going on, that is not the time to say, Oh my God, why am I like this? I feel so guilty. I know better. I’ve been at the self development thing for a long time, because honestly, that is what maintains it. That is not a resources, resources, not guilt and shame. That’s just an emotion. That’s just how we feel, right? We need to heal fragmentation through resources. And we only find resources by asking better questions. Therefore, what’s wrong with me, is not one of those. I’ve never really had a successful resource finding thing after that, because usually I just go cry and feel bad about myself, which is fine for a period of time, but that you can’t stay there, right isn’t there’s no destination, that’s just that will stop off. And you can stay there for as long as you stay there. And no judgment. I’ve done that for a long time. I’m just saying that that’s kind of where that road leads. And therefore, we need to when we begin to identify the root cause, the very next question is, what are the resources? I need? Not what someone else said? What are the resources that I need to heal that? And honestly, when that kind of this is where the the client story comes in, right? What does that actually create? Because it can sound good, right? You’re like, I want to heal. And yeah, I hear you, Alex, my life just doesn’t feel good globally. And it’s not really cohesive. And I second guess myself a lot. But like, I just really want those symptoms to go away. So I’m really going to worry about my food and my supplements. And so it’s really easy to be like, yeah, yeah, I will get there. But this is what I mean by resources. And what it allows you to do, because I was working with someone who, and this is common for me and what Megan and I do inside our Health Transformation accelerator. And of course, when we have practitioners go through our certification programs to work similarly to what we do that we see this a lot, but the trauma, right. And women have had experiences that have really fragmented them from them. And it’s serious, very valid things right. Childhood Trauma, abuse, sexual abuse, separation, deaths, abandonment, 

there’s a lot that can happen, physical trauma and occurrences, right, very many things that can happen to us. And that often kicks off just like I said, In the beginning, that fragmentation process and as adults we really see is had enough time where that fragmentation begins to show up. And as we go, it creates more and more problems for us in our life. And so, here I am working with someone very similar. It’s who I used to be right so it makes sense that I attract those kinds of clients. And then we started unpacking a lot of self doubt, a lot of lack of trust. You know, I’ve felt like He put ourselves in certain situations that weren’t the best. So there was some lack of trusting intuition, feeling like, Well, gosh, I listened to other authorities. And it took us some time to work through those things and begin to unpackage how these interpretations of life and who she was got set up and began to heal that fragmentation to reclaim more of who she is right you can, when you are more whole within yourself, that’s where the authenticity, you can see what you actually want. The authentic desires are then cohesive together, as well. And then courage, you need courage to be authentic, and that wholeness you get more of who you are behind you, and you have more courage and power to work with. And from that place, here came out life and in the universe, God, whoever you look at, plopped an opportunity in front of her lap, where all of a sudden, life said here, you have this choice, you can go here and have this whole other path and have this happen. Or you can make some other decisions and not go that route, what would you like to do. And that often happens when we say, I want to be someone who trusts myself, I want to be a person that’s home, I want to be powerful, I want to stand on my own empowerment, I want to make choices for myself, guess what, we get opportunities to prove that we are who we say we are, right, and here comes an opportunity, and it’s in her lap. And from that place, she had a decision to make was she going to put her energy and, and kind of vote with her actions on her new identity or the old? Right? The new identity it she speaks up for herself, she’s honest and authentic about what she needs. Even if that upset someone else, she speaks up for herself, she prioritizes her own values and what she’s here to accomplish in this world. Or the other option was more of what she’s done, right? Following someone else’s plan, doing what doesn’t feel good, fitting into someone else’s box, losing out, and D prioritizing her dreams, and what lights are up every day. And really, that’s not what it ever pops out as right in your lap. It looks like a job offer or a house or something. But at the end of the day, the identity and the fragmentation. That’s the decision we’re making at any given point. Do I work with that provider? Who sounds different? Or am I going to be like in? Well, I’ll just try that diet again. Right. And that’s what it sounds like. But we really this is where it’s worth thinking through at this higher level to say, that old identity of trying that new diet is not who I want to be and that has not been working and I need to be resourced enough to see that and move forward. Right. And so that presented her. And in that moment, she chose the new identity. And during that conversation, there was multiple conversations that need to be had, like I said, you know, life just unfolds, right? And usually, here’s an idea, I got to talk to this person, what do we think What do you think? And, and having those, she had the wholeness behind her to have the courage to actually say what she wanted 

and completely deviate from the groove that she was in. And the next day, she wakes up, and we met and she told me, she said, and we had it scheduled. So this wasn’t like something that we scheduled just so I get tired. It was like it was already scheduled. We just happen. It happened to be time at that she goes on, she’s like, I spoke up for myself. I fell asleep without anything. I slept through the night. never did that before, you know recently, and and then my blood pressure was down. My blood sugar was normal. When I started to write physiologic parameters. Now she did wake up better mood, less fatigued, didn’t want you know, to to not do work like she was just dealing with some kind of lower motivation stuff when which totally makes sense when you don’t feel good. But lo and behold the motivations back, Ryan, it’s not willpower that she’s using. She’s just excited about where she’s going. And that that was an overnight thing. That right there is an overnight thing, the end and when you think of it from the level of fragmentation, and you anchor it into that interpretation. In the lack of fragmentation is perceived by your brain in your brain is the one controlling your heart rate and your blood pressure, your your vessels, kind of how stiff or relaxed your blood vessels are, which determines your blood pressure, right? The utilization of picking up blood sugar and your reactivity to insulin. So I hope that you can see here and that her standing up for her wholeness, and acting from a place of unity. And using the resources that she has developed to stand in her power, she then was able to physiologically impact things. And we had already made a lot of progress on that stuff with things like supplements and parasympathetic, and lots of tools, there’s like, that’s the thing, the toolkit is endless, the number of resources you can have is actually infinite, because there’s a lot of us, and we all will have a different combination and different toolkit available to us. It’s just not everyone’s the same, and that’s okay. But in using those things, and beginning to function from that place, from the resource place, and to fight for her new identity, her body healed. So this whole discussion of fragmentation and healing, even though it doesn’t sound like food, or supplements, or genetics that I’m talking about, this is what it looks like. Now, I am not advocating for losing all that other stuff. And in fact, that’s what Megan and I know what makes us unique. The fact that we talk about the body, the mind, the emotions, and the soul is our whole deal, right? wholeness is wholeness, you just can’t leave any, you can’t leave any part of you out. But that means you also don’t leave any part of life out necessarily, it’s good and bad, and everything in between. and So my argument is not that those things are not good, those other things. I love those resources. But you have to understand that if you’re focusing on not the most root cause thing, and to me, that is fragmentation. And who you are, you a will lose out on a bunch of resources, because you’ll just be stuck with only the diets and only the supplements and only the meds and hoping that at some point that works. And it can I’m not knocking that it’s just not the most powerful way to do it. Or, you can see that all of the matters. And that opens up so many more avenues for healing and reclaiming who you are and reclaiming that power. And guess what it makes the supplements work better. It makes the parasympathetic practices hardwire even faster. Because you can do parasympathetic isolated until you’re blue in the face. And you will hardwire some of that into your system. It’s impossible not to but if you go and then live like, I don’t really want to go there. But I will and I’ll make myself do that. And now that’s not really aligned. And that kind of hurts me but I won’t say anything because I still you know, it’s his family dynamic. Or we’ve always had this kind of relationship or I don’t want to lose my security here because I rock the boat here. All of those things that undermine like you just really not being honest with yourself about how things make you feel and whether you like it or not. 

You that is so ever present. Think about how many times in your life you do something and make a decision to interact with someone talk, answer an email, do things that way. You don’t take enough supplements. No, even if you have 60 supplements you take a day, you are still taking supplements fewer times a day than you are making decisions like that. Because that’s a moment by moment, emotion by emotion, thought by thought thing, right? If you gaslight yourself, like tired and you’re like, oh, whatever, I just, I’ll just keep going. That’s you just did it exactly in that moment. The same thing someone else would be doing instead of them forcing you to do something you don’t want to do. You just did the same thing. You blew through all the different cues. That’s not to say you need a rest every time you have that thought, but at least acknowledged that you heard you and you give a damn. Right that’s what that looks like. It’s not that we then quit normal modern life and go live in a cave and we’re like screw everybody. I’m not doing anything. That’s not That’s not wholeness, either. That loses connection that loses our sense of community belonging, that is not the answer. Because fragmentation is never the answer. Because fragmentation with that lack of resources. Is the whole crux of the problem to begin with. And that is why it’s really, really important to take a beat and say, How does this show up for me? Where have I healed fragmentation? Because you’ve have, right? If you’ve been doing stuff you have, you need to acknowledge it. So at least you can, if you lie to yourself and say you haven’t, when you have, you will feel bad about yourself, and it will not motivate you. Right? So you got to acknowledge if you’ve tried diets, you’ve gotten good at trying diets say that, right. And at the same time, acknowledging that, gosh, I keep going that way. There’s a whole lot of me left, there’s a whole lot of me that still feels under supported under resource and I feel insecure about my health, I feel nervous about my finances, I’m not really happy here, right? That is what that will look like, and you know it. But when we are not asking the right questions, aka, I’m, what are the resources, I need to feel better, then we will keep stuck in the fragmentation. And that will ultimately maintain the problem. For as long as that fragmentation and lack of resources continue. This is a really big thing to chew on. What I recommend, is doing a little bit of free writing, or a lot of it free writing looks like sitting down and assigning either a number of minutes or a number of pages, to pick a topic and just write everything that comes to your mind. 

A lot of times I like going through, what are the physical sensations around this that I’m experiencing? Or have physical problems? And then okay, what emotions? Am I picking up on? What thoughts Am I having? What how do I feel at my soul level? How does this fit into the bigger picture of why do I think I’m here? What am I doing? What am I accomplishing on this in this lifetime? Right? And the reason I do it that way is that we are systematically asking and looking for information from all of who we are, and really allowing all of who we are to speak. What’s really cool about free writing and asking these kinds of questions is that it will point you into the direction of resources, because you’ll either have an idea of what to do. Or you’ll identify a problem that then you can ask what resources may be helpful. You may need to do a little research on that. But it gets you going in the right direction. And I’m gonna give you one right now is the resources that we’re going to be doing this in a five day challenge coming up and the link is in the shownotes. There’s a couple of really great things about this one, this is different than what we’ve been doing in the past, though it is still on the topic of who are you becoming? And what do you need, as the resources to get there. And that’s not very different from the habit challenge that we did in the past. But this one is actually going to be less work for you. Because Megan and I are more resource stuff. This is a five day process and a five day challenge where we’re going to be teaching you how to do subconscious reprogramming utilization, by listening. So there will be action that you take during this challenge. But it will be very different. Because the resources that we’re going to be teaching you are less effort and more foundationally transformational. And we’re going to show you in real time exactly what that looks like you’re going to experience the transformation. And then we’re going to break it down for you and how you do this for yourself. And when you put it together like this, the resources that you get from this, then the sheer number of resources and the value that you can generate from learning this strategy is the thing that will resolve this problem that we’re talking about fragmentation and doing a bunch of stuff from that, you know, worrying about stuff second guessing things having all sorts of problems. Those things are just pointing us in the direction of developing processes like this for ourselves and knowing how it positively impacts you. So we are so so so excited. This we’ve spent years on Getting a lot more certifications, doing courses, working on ourselves working with our clients. And this is we’re beginning to bring more and more of the resources we have found into the work that we’re doing because our stuff is no different. Everything’s cohesive, because who we are here, who you who you’re listening to in the podcast is who I am. And that is our whole thing. Right? And that’s why it has to be that way. And that is why Megan and I continue to go outside the box of Yes, we love. We love our business mentors like James Wedmore, Brandon Lucero, Jim Fortin, love them. And it always comes back through the filter of how does this look like wholeness, unity, and empowering resources for us, because of that doesn’t check out, it will not get us the results that we’re after. It doesn’t matter how smart the person is that told us if it doesn’t work for us, it doesn’t work for us. 

And what’s very sad about that is that many of us have that realization. And we still don’t act differently. We still don’t go and seek out people who are saying, okay, don’t listen to me, I’m going to help you find resources that work for you. Right. And that is why Megan and I started teaching practitioners, because we do need a whole army of people who are out there being teachers being healers, being coaches being working for addiction centers, and who have resources to bring and facilitate someone to wholeness rather than maintaining the fragmentation, which really cultivates things like guilt and shame. And we look around, and we see how many people are struggling. I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to do things the way we’re doing them anymore. I know a lot of people, we’ve been saying that for a couple years. And yet I still see people taking action as if it’s the same. And it’s so easy to do, Megan, and I struggle with it too. You know, we go to do something that we’ve done year after year, and it comes time to do it. And we’re like, cool, let’s fire that off. And only at some point do we think Wait, just because we’ve always done it that way doesn’t mean that it has to be done that way. So it’s really easy to get swept up in the flow. But that notwithstanding, we kind of know the things that require mastery and dedication are the things that are worthwhile. So I leave you with this. If you hope to accomplish big things in the world and you’re hoping to impact people powerfully, whether that’s your family, or a bigger group of people, as a collective doesn’t matter. Honestly, it’s the same. You can say oh, one person has more people listening to them does not matter. It’s not a numbers game. It’s an impact game. So if you are doing that, and you want to get the results and make the impact you want, you are going to have to come into a position of power and internal power comes from wholeness. And that wholeness requires the authenticity and the courage that I’m speaking on here. And asking these questions, it doesn’t feel like you’re doing a lot, but understand that you’re becoming a lot. And who you become, will be the person with the resources. And that is the path that you need to take yourself on. That is the path. So we’re going to break this down for you. Super duper clearly, right, this was the big high level overview of what we’re talking about. And the conversation that Megan and I will be having moving forward. This to us is what it’s about. And therefore, lots more to come. But please join us for the challenge. The link is down below in the show notes. If you’re signed up for our email list, you’ll also get an invite. If you’re not go to zestyginger.com/welcome and just get signed up that way you get the emails, you can win $500 from participating in the challenge by filling out the workbook and watching or and listening to all five it’s going to be a podcast series, all five podcasts and filling out the workbook turning it in by August. Oh sorry. By September 21, yeah. So September is that’s a Sunday, and that there’s going to be a $500 prize. And you can win a breakthrough session with a coach. There’s also going to be a surprise option that we’re not going to announce right now. But it’s a good one. So you definitely want to get signed up, get all prepped, and really is coming up quite soon. The challenge is September 12. It begins to kick off. And at that point, actually, no, I totally lied. Yeah, no, it’s 12 through 16. That was right, I got I got these first, again, the September, September 12, is when it kicks off on the podcast. And so it’s really, it’s coming up really pretty soon. 

I recommend listening to this, doing some of that free writing that I recommend, and then also getting signed up. Because that free writing is going to give you a lot more information, it will help shift your perspective, the five days will help you know how to apply it and turn that into resources, an actual tangible help for you assistance, and how you can help yourself feel better day to day, right. Because it’s going to take it takes all of us a while to get to where we’re going. It’s important that the path and the journey, be one that helps us become who we’re actually intending to become. And not just, you know, doing whatever expecting that one day is just going to pop out out of thin air. And unfortunately, that’s not how it works. So come join that we’ll get you moving in the right direction. And by the end of the five days. If you follow along and you do the workbook, you will come out with more resources than you have right now. Period. Because if you do that process, and and you get nothing from yourself, that doesn’t really happen, right? You can’t ask good questions, and have nothing happen. That’s not how that works. So if you do it, that’s it right. And the reason Meg and I are doing it this way and using those resources that people are tired, that’s why we’re not doing a challenge that’s like here and then doing a million things is literally teaching you resources that allow you to get the most bang for your buck with the least amount of effort on your part. That’s the whole point. Right? So it’s very exciting. This is really foundational stuff. And, really, it is designed to move you from where you are to where you want to be, which is exactly what we’re all looking for. Right. So come check it out, get signed up, come on, start listening on the 12, you’ll get an email, as well, you’ll get an email with the workbook shortly before. And then all you need to do is turn the workbook in, and you’ll get entered to win for the prizes. And you’ll be hearing from us about that. So we so can’t wait. We’re really really hyped about this. This is so in alignment with us. And what we see everybody’s struggling with. And as we’ve applied this with the people we’re already working with, the results are like, I mean, we’ll be doing a podcast series with getting people that we work with coming on and just sharing their transformations because honestly, you don’t need to hear from us. You can hear it straight from them. It’s way more fun that way. Right? So we’ll be doing that and that’s coming but you don’t have to listen to other people’s come get your own transformation like fight for it. You deserve it, you are more all this stuff that I said up front, the second guessing the dealing with the crap that always feeling like you’re coming out at the bottom, always feeling like other people are priority. Enough already. Right? Enough of that. It’s time to do things differently. It’s time to just be sick of that and go do something else. Do something differently. If that’s you. And even if it’s not you, but you can you think that you’re heading in that way. Come on over. We’re doing it anyways. We’re gonna be transforming the slides pretty good. I highly recommend you come join us on this side of the equation because man being in your own power and standing in your own authenticity and making your life look aligned. Makes that low, you know, normal blood pressure, low blood sugar, good sleep, no fatigue, look piddly because what you really want is to be happy to feel loved, feel connected and like you belong, right? It’s not rocket science here. So go get yourself that. Right. And we’re here For you, where we’ll show you we can’t do it for you. But we’ll do whatever we can to facilitate showing you and teaching you in a way that allows you to go apply it and just make that your own reality. Nothing teaches like you getting your own results, and it feels so damn good. So go get signed up from the shownotes and we cannot wait to see you there sending lots of love.