Season 17, Episode 19- The Cost of Breaking Promises with Yourself

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Megan Blacksmith 

Hello there. Welcome back to The Zesty Podcast. This is Megan today. And, gosh, it’s been such a good month over here as everybody else having a good March, we had so much training and habit series and all the good stuff happening end of February, which led right into our new group, our transformation accelerator group who is just cruising on in. And we had our Week Three call this week, which is about what you want setting your goal and placing it exactly what you want to the universe. So I thought today would be really cool to give you a little inside peek a little inside peek to what it’s like to be in our groups just a little like 10 minute or so peek of the call we had on Monday night, I was in such flow, sharing about breaking promises with yourself and keeping promises with yourself and others and how much that does to tell your brain that you are so safe and to tell your brain that it is okay to go for your goals. And to keep that promise between you and you and I got into such a flow, I thought hey, you know what I think I want to share this little piece of the call with the podcast so you all can hear what we do inside the group. So we have an announcement that we have two spots left in our upcoming April certification program. So this is a seven day in-person training in Dallas, Texas, you will leave with four certifications, that is NLP, NLP life coaching, Quantum Time technique, and hypnosis, you will leave with the exact structure and package to go help people to have a way to help them break through any of their stuff, whether it’s around health, whether it’s around their family, whether it’s around business, this is a process of transformation. It’s a way of teaching them how to think and how to talk directly to the unconscious mind, the unconscious mind which is running the whole show. Because 95% of the time, we are just using our unconscious mind, the conscious mind is the goal setter, that’s where we think about things we actually want. And the unconscious mind is really the goal-getter. So we need to have all of our beliefs in line with what we want, we need to have all of the strategies aligned with what we want all of the habits and these are primarily just running on autopilot in the unconscious mind because that would be a lot of things to do. If we were tapping into the conscious mind every single day with that so if you are a practitioner, a coach, a doctor, a nutritionist, a naturopath, we’ve had lots of FDN NDPs whatever it is, if you’re helping people or if you want to have a huge personal breakthrough, if you have something going on in your own life, then come check it out. I am happy to jump on the phone with you and do a 30-minute consult if you’ve been interested and you want to know about the two remaining spots we have we are sending out an email to our whole coach and practitioner list so potentially they will already be gone by the time you see this and if that’s so we will have our next program was also in October. So if you want to get in now if you want to get in on the pricing that we have now, just come on over to you can email me support at zesty ginger.com. And we’re happy to set you up with a consultation or we’ll put the link to just go ahead and join if you’re ready in the show notes. Okay, we would love love love to see you there. We have a fabulous group of women. We are so excited to have this amazing problem the problem We have actually hit capacity, close to capacity in the event space in the next training in October, we will be moving to a new space, that’s going to be much bigger. So exciting things happening in the world of zesty, a place where our goal is to help shift conventional medicine, our help, our goal is to change the paradigm of how people get support in their health. And one of the ways we’re doing that is to train other people in our processes, other people to understand the power of not just our physical body, but our mental body, our emotional body, and our energetic body, and how they are intertwined. And one of the most important topics that we start with is keeping your word with yourself, that’s integrity. So let’s get into a little piece of the call from Monday night. And joy. I want to talk about integrity. And I want to talk about it from many different angles. So one is, when it comes to coaching, or business or whatever it is that big goal, that big project that you have that thing, there was a company that in 1992, they did this experiment, and all they did was change one thing within the company, everything else stayed the same. And they would triple, tripled their valuation in three years. So they tripled the value of the company. And that one thing was that they now brought to the attention of the company, the idea of integrity. And they measured it, and that was it. So what does that even mean? Right? What does integrity even mean? So this is the idea of being impeccable with your word says that we do what we say. And there’s going to be some major caveats to this. So who here has done that pattern of when they tell someone else that they’re going to do something, they do it, but when they tell themselves, they’re gonna do something like start a certain habit, eat healthier, move more drink water, it kind of doesn’t necessarily do that fascinating thing about this can happen. This can actually even spread. This happened for Alex and I, it started with us where when I would tell myself I’d do something, and maybe if I would tell her I’d do something I would. And then Alex and I formed into one little blob of a human and a brain. And now sometimes it was creeping in that we weren’t even keeping our word to each other. We were moving those calls and moving those things because really what was coming up was fears. And it was so easy. It’s so easy to tell Alex, you know, I’m just, I just you know, I’m a little rundown today, let’s not do that podcast, we said, right. And over time this wears down. More importantly, I mean, it could wear your relationship. Luckily, we’ve been able to keep it very open. But more importantly, it actually wears down between you and you. You no longer trust that you do what you are going to say. Okay, so a lot of times will tell people the thing is so hard for me. And as soon as I say that, it becomes easier. Yeah. Yes, yes, yes. So now, I would love for you to think about this in every area of your life for one, say what you mean, and let’s just talk about that. Start by even saying what you mean, and being very direct with people. And you can clear up a lot of this. Because if we’re saying we’re going to do things that we really don’t want to do, that we don’t think we even should have to do and we’re not excited about doing and we don’t see any value in doing it because somebody else says we should do it. Are we going to do that? Probably not. Right? So let’s start by especially if there’s a partner or kids saying to them hey when I say Yep, totally cool that you go out tonight I mean that and stick with that okay? So that everybody can just like not to try not try to read minds not try to go did they really mean that? I mean, they said it was okay but kind of seems like it would put them out. No, like when we when say the thing we mean it that is going to tell you and yourself and your own unconscious mind that you mean what you say it’s also great for friendships, of course. This is the thing, this is where this gets into goal setting. How many of you have you are thinking like, Oh, shoot. Now if I have to, if integrity is super important, like it’s pretty high on the list of importance, then now I’m afraid to say I’m gonna do anything or go for any goal. Who has that come up with? Like Well, now I don’t want to say anything because what if I don’t make it? What if I don’t do it? okay because that was what I had for me. So The cool thing about integrity is that it’s not just doing what you say. It’s either one, keeping your word and doing what you say, or if not. All that means is that you are letting people know if it’s just you and you letting yourself know, but if it’s with someone else, you’re letting the other parties know you’re informing them, you’re cleaning up any mess that maybe you caused an error in their life, you said you were gonna do the thing. Now you’re not doing the thing. What do you need to do? Do you need to help them find a babysitter? Because whatever it is, whatever the scenario is, what we often do, is pretend things don’t happen. Who has done that? With ourselves or others, right? We’re like, I kind of said, I was going to start doing that. And I haven’t really started doing that, but maybe nobody will notice, right? Or like, yeah, I didn’t quite get that thing in on time to my boss. But you know, nobody’s brought it up. And I said I’d do it. But like nobody would notice. So we think if we just don’t mention it, that it might just kind of slide under this is the thing, though, again, we’re losing trust with ourselves is most important, yes, with other people, but really with our with ourselves. Okay, so now what I want to say here is integrity is really important. And going for really big goals is just as important, in my opinion. And that’s why you’re here. So this is the thing, when you are out on the leading edge, and you’re about to do something different. Or you’re really going for major transformation, whether it’s in your physical body, whether it’s to grow a business, whether it’s to write a book, whatever it is, when you’re out there, you will actually be out of integrity most of the time. Why is that? Because it’s totally brand new. If you’re writing a book for the first time, and you say, Yeah, I’m gonna have that draft by June, and you’re doing it for the first time, you don’t really know. You’re guessing, right? You don’t really know how long it’s gonna take. The key is over and over. Not that we don’t say we’re going to do it not that we don’t put the date, it’s just that when we get close, or when we realize, Hi, I’m no longer on the track. Like as soon as we realize and ideally as early as possible. We’re just restoring that relationship. Hi. I said, I do this and you’re renegotiating. So think of this with Pete and other people, but this is with yourself. And as long as you are doing that you are still in integrity. So I can place huge monstrous goals in my timeline, write them down, and say I’m going to do them. And I can get two months out and go, Oh, wow, that was actually way bigger than I thought. All I need to do is renegotiate with either myself or whoever’s involved and say, Hey, this is what this is how it’s actually looking. And this is what I think the new timeline is. So does everybody see how those go together, and you’re still going to aim for all is being impacted packable with your word? And at the same time, it’s just letting yourself the universe, your family, and whoever’s involved know, as they shift. It’s just a really common pattern we see of like, I just noticed for myself, I was so afraid of saying we would do things in our business because I did not want to be out of integrity and not do them. And therefore, probably half the things that maybe I could have finished by now I didn’t even start. Whereas if I had just looked at this of well, let’s go for it. And we can course correct on the way we would have had a lot more stuff. So I’m going to push you to consider your goals further than what you really think is I’m going to do air quotes possible. Because it actually doesn’t matter whether you get the thing or don’t get the thing. What matters is that you’re living the identity of the person who has the thing you become the person who has whatever it is, and you know you have this amazingly healthy body and you feel good all the time. Whether it’s like an amount of money or amount of clients. You start to show up every day like you’re that person.