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In this episode of The Zesty Ginger Podcast, Dr. Alex discusses the misconceptions about masculine and feminine energies. She also talks about the importance of honoring both the masculine and the feminine energy and how flexibility and flow can help us achieve our goals in life.

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Dr. Alex Golden 

Hello, hello, welcome to the podcast. This is Dr. Alex here with you, I am so glad that you’re here. Also, I wanted to thank you all so much for getting in touch with me and leaving comments are wrapped around this masculine-feminine topic. I love, love, love the interaction with y’all. So thank you so much. I love to hear what’s going on in your world, and make all of this super duper applicable and relevant for what’s going on in your life. So thank you so much for doing that. I always appreciate when y’all do that. So thank you. Before I kick off this particular podcast episode, I did want to invite you next week, our coaches connect our free monthly meetup is part two of dealing with difficult clients. So you heard a snippet of that on the podcast from the first call, and hopefully have heard the full first call that is available it is for free, you can certainly catch up on that that would be really good to do before this next upcoming call, we’ll put a link in the show notes. But basically, if you work with any humans, now, it is about clients, however, you will hear during that call and during this upcoming one, just how much this, this is not any different from anybody else that you deal with. So if there’s anybody else in your life that you persuade, that is to say, Kids, partners, and not only persuade but influence and interface with and want the best for, the more equipped we are with difficult situations, the more powerfully we can help the world. So that is the goal of those meetups. And the secondary goal also is to all come together as a community of like-minded humans who are really caring about supporting people as they move through transformation and getting the results that they’re after. So check that out. The link is going to be in the show notes. And just a reminder, we do that monthly. Right. So we are talking about the feminine today. All right, so we already talked about from the very first episode, masculine and feminine energies are not they don’t have anything to do with gender. And they are not specifically talking about sexuality. These are archetypal energies that all humans carry. And they are ways of describing our inner landscape, masculine and feminine does not encompass all of who we are. Therefore, there’s many aspects of us that we could also talk about. It’s just that this particular series is not about those other things, but honing in on these two polarities, right? If these are expressions of energies, you can look at them as polarities. And then the interplay of these polarities is then mixed and matched, and each individual and each individual moment in each individual scenario, however, that person wants to and feels like expressing it. Right. So these, that’s the description of masculine and feminine. And that’s why it has nothing to do with more than some of those more concrete things like gender or sexuality, certainly they interface with that if someone chooses to. So there’s lots of misconceptions in my opinion, about feminine energies. Because people like to take polarities and dualities, and they like to make them black and white, and they like to make clear delineations between them. But if we just refer back to the definition we establish on what we’re talking about here there is less distinction between them and more of a flow of nature you have to be able to explain then everything that fits into masculine and feminine dynamics into those and so the mix and match really matters and so, there is much less delineation and when we honor what actually is the truth which is gray area in the mix and matching, then we can avoid a lot of guilt and shame. And two, we can all get into a lot less disagreements, especially on the internet, right? A lot of what I see about masculine-feminine is people fighting about things that are actually incorrect because of that it is worthwhile to chew on dualities and polarities and a more insightful manner, at least in my opinion, right, we can really begin to honor both sides or multiple sides of both the masculine and both the feminine. So you will hear me doing that as I describe the feminine and because today we’re talking about the feminine. Next time we’re going to talk about the masculine. I want to just start with the feminine because, in my opinion there, this is explained in a more skewed format when it’s things online. Probably because things online are bite-size, you know, when you have a 15-second, really you got to distill something down into something bite-size unquantifiable, right? And so I think the challenge is topic, meats, media, and then together that short form, undercut some important details. So a lot of times the feminine is painted as soft, gentle, submissive, flowy, flexible, sweet, nurturing, all of these things. That, in my opinion, is very, very true. All of those aspects of the feminine are, in fact true, and are beautiful expressions, at least in my opinion of the feminine. Here’s what will come back to that though, because first things first, we have to establish that the feminine energies and the masculine energies that we hold, depending on which one someone more strongly is representing at any given time, or maybe they’re just dominant in their life like from, for me, I am predominantly feminine. And my energy is that energy in and of itself, is also very powerful, the masculine and the feminine energies are equally powerful in their own right. So while the feminine does have aspects of softness and gentleness, that in no way then takes away from the power that the feminine has, that equally matches the masculine power that the masculine then holds. This is very important because I think that the narrative that the feminine is strictly the Express feminine at least is someone who is always soft and quiet and nurturing. And it almost paints the picture that someone shouldn’t be also angry, sometimes when someone crosses over your boundaries, or that you don’t have to sometimes let be loud or forceful or powerful, right? There are plenty of times in life where that is true. And that is key to accomplishing what needs to happen in life. But we can have our power come out when we are in our masculine power. And we can also choose to have our feminine power and play, they are equally powerful, and yet they are just different. This is key because some things in life do require a direct masculine approach, and we’ll talk about that next time. And what that looks like. But some things require a lot of power, but they require a lot of flexibility and flow and figuring it out and magic and the unknown and, and figuring things out. And that is where feminine power can come into it. And that is not weak at all. And one of the best things we can point to is childbirth. Now not every woman or not, because it’s not gender specific, not every man who identifies into the feminine energy, more often will not have that experience. Right? So that is totally fine. But we can use that as an expression of powerful feminine energy and that childbirth is unpredictable. It’s unknown. It is the creation of life and a lot of destruction at the same time. There are cycles, that contractions come and go, there is squeezed, there’s relaxation, there’s times to be on, there’s times to be off. All of these are beautiful expressions of feminine power, the way that feminine power would move the energy of the world to make something happen to actually create life. And in that one we’re talking about literally, but we can also talk about, sort of, metaphorically, the power to create life then and the act of that, and the expression of that power looks different in that, and so childbirth can be a really beautiful example of that. And then I like to take it even further to a metaphor. So feminine energy, my personal favorite way to visualize this is the power of the ocean, right? When we combine the feminine descript descriptors, where there is a lot of power, and yet there are these components of nurturing and life-giving aspects of creation, of teamwork, of collaboration of cyclical life form plans, right? Someone eats the plankton, the plankton get eaten by somebody else, those people get eaten by somebody else, the whales eat everything, or the sharks eat them, the whales do that. The whole thing just flows, right? And so the ocean is a really beautiful image, in my opinion of when I go back to feminine power. And I asked myself what it looks like in me, I often have the visual of the power of the ocean, right? Because then, along with all the stuff that I just said, with all the life-giving functions, the ocean will also create a mess of damage, well, not when the ocean rages. It is powerful. And in some ways, it can be dangerous. Now, if you’ve ever seen, or you have been, in your feminine expression pierced, you know exactly what I’m talking about. And anybody, regardless of gender, might have can relate to this, right. And so, when the ocean rages, there is a lot of energy that can get kicked up to create and some of it is destructive still, and some of it still helps in creation the same way you know, wildfires help bring in an usher in a new plant life and forest, the same thing can happen in the ocean. So these visuals help us understand that the feminine, while she has aspects of flexibility and flow like water does. Water is relentless at the heart of it and his pursuit. Let’s keep going on these visuals then think of a river cutting through rock, right? This is different than a laser cutting through something a water source of water flowing over time, will cut it but it is relentless in its pursuit of flowing into whatever crevices can be found and over time creating deeper and deeper channels. And that’s how we get no things like the Grand Canyon or whatever. And so, that is another thing that the feminine expression can be they can be the full expression in the ocean when we’re looking at our feminine energies that expansively, and then we can also say we can direct feminine energies to flow into different situations to permeate all of our life to trickle in feminine flow into all of who we are and to allow ourselves to flow with the rhythm of life. To understand when life is asking us to be more flexible when it’s asking us to recede back or maybe go into a new path into a new strategy, apply a new try a new thing to get feedback. That visual for me is the river. Right? Because when the river meets some sort of obstacle, sometimes it just flow keeps flowing out anyways until the obstacle disappears. And sometimes it just flows around and you see a bend in the river and off it goes I love that because both of these visuals help me feel into my own expression of feminine energy, especially when I feel the feminine power in me rising. And sometimes that can come from intense emotions. And sometimes that can come because I intend to utilize that energy in my own life in order to accomplish something, right? I’m actually accessing the feminine power that I hold intentionally. So this idea that feminine is weak, I think, when we take that apart, and we see just how much feminine energies go neck and neck and neck with the masculine in terms of power, then what we begin to do is ushering in a lot deeper conversations that accurately represent these two energies. Because, quite frankly, when people hear on the internet, the masculine is powerful in decision making and feminine is weak, and she’s submissive and goes along with it. Well, gosh, there’s a lot of feminine associating people that I know that would be like, No, thank you. Because if you associate with more feminine energies, and you don’t feel weak, that in no way feels like it relates to you. Right, which was just, in my opinion, totally understandable. I don’t necessarily feel like I’m, like, Oh, I’m so gentle and weak all the time. Right. So I think that’s where it gets us a little bit into trouble. It’s not that those things aren’t also true about the feminine, because, yeah, you look at nature in the way that animals can be nurturing to, like unlikely pairings and the way that nature takes care of itself, and the way that you see some humans going above and beyond for others. There’s, there’s real nurturing, and caring and gentleness, too, but at the same time, you’ll hear it next time, it’s not to say that the masculine doesn’t have those aspects either, right, the masculine can also be gentle and loving, and nurturing and kind. And so we need to make a case for both covering a lot of spectrums in life, and be able to bring in a lot of different flavors of energy, but they are just to be used in different ways. Because if they feel different if they garner a different results, well, gosh, having multiple options, and each category, having different ways of being powerful, and having different ways of being gentle, is then very, very supportive. And then it allows us to highlight, which one gets skewed and which individual and energies then make up more masculine and feminine dynamics that are quite honestly more nuanced, right. Because when we talk about things like the feminine, being submissive to the masculine, then it is a choice for any given moment for a feminine to submit, right. But when a feminine is healthy, in her own power in their own expression, and it is filled out and full, then we can see we don’t the feminine does not submit or not choose to submit out of weakness, or out of insecurity, or out of you are more powerful than me, therefore, I will do this. It’s actually a coming together and a choice made from honoring the expression of both energies on any given scenario. It also means that when feminine power is needed, that can come forward. And the choice can be made to not submit to masculine or any other energies, right? Maybe not submit to what how life is life-ing if that’s not what you’re choosing, right, sometimes we want to fight something that’s happening and there’s nothing wrong with fighting for the results that we want. What’s cool about saying feminine than as water is that when we talk about things like the feminine submitting or being submissive and we highlight how On much it is a choice to flow in certain energies and in certain directions and to make choices around how we allow life to flow and how we interact with it. Submission then becomes at least as part of the feminine, a very powerful choice. We then are not forced to, and I say we, as anyone who identifies more into the feminine energies, or at least at any given time, right? It allows submission to be a powerful choice to come together in connection, love, and unity. And if something is not feeling like that, then the feminine has the power to choose otherwise. Now, when we talk about like that doesn’t submission, then not sound like something that is like, oh, and then you got to just do stuff that sucks, which is so often what I hear on social media, right? There’s this argument of, well, gosh, what if I don’t want to do what he says I want to do, or what if I don’t want to have my family live like that? Here’s the thing, you really don’t have to the ocean is not quiet river cutting through stone is not weak, right? We get to say, when we make the choice to say this is super important to me, the flow will be directed in this direction, let’s work this out. As we go through this series, we’ll be able to build on all of these concepts, because we’ll talk about the feminine influencing the masculine for decisions. Now, this is not only done with the other person or with a other person, but within yourself, how is your own feminine influencing your masculine, and we’ll talk about it vice versa. So these negotiations, if you think, you know, oh, I’m not going to do this with other people, it’s still present within each individual. So it is really crucial to understand how much each feminine in each masculine gets to make their own choice, because they will ultimately influence each other. And I will argue that they are supposed to, right? If both energies bring in pros and cons to situations, then in things like life doing its thing, and things coming up, you want to be able to choose from whatever is happening, and choose the most appropriate thing. So in my opinion, that is why is it set up to be a negotiation, because when you’re dealing with the unknown, sometimes you got to get there and then say, what needs to happen now, right? You just don’t know until you do that. And so these negotiations within us and others, then we began to see if we see both parts of feminine and masculine as equally powerful, and bringing things to the table. The influencing of each and both direction becomes a fluid form of seeking connection, and love. And that’s really what it is, right? So anybody who if you’re listening along, and you’re like, I’ve had a problem with the concept of submission from, you know, in the masculine, feminine, and that just sounds icky and outdated. And like, we’re reverting back to the, you know, before women could vote and all that, to me, those are two completely different discussions, right, is that when we create this definition of submission, to me that’s not up applicable to coercion, or loss of autonomy, or anything like that. It is simply by acts of bringing self-awareness to our world, ad using that to make choices that feel best to us. Right. We will come back time and time again to that topic because in my opinion, the whole concept of masculine feminine and submitting and who’s in control and all that is the greatest sticking point that we have in the collective discussion on this right now. So we’ll just be right saying that time and time again because that’s how it goes. So let’s wrap up, with finishing up what the feminine does. Mother Earth is a great example of the creative and cyclical nature of femininity because she reminds us, that the moon is like those two, that things flow and that there’s seasons, right? So there are some things in life that are constant. And so there are energies created for that, and that they exist within us. And then for the feminine. There are scenarios and situations and things that are cyclical, and things that work better being cyclical, kind of like nature, right? Things bloom, and then when they die, they fertilize the soil so that things can bloom. And so it works best cyclical like that. Periods are like that, too. And so one of the coolest things, in my opinion, one of the coolest functionalities of the feminine, is being able to flow in seasons, and knowing what time is for what, right, sometimes, you know, you have to wait. And then it’s more of the Art of Having fun waiting. And then sometimes it’s great action, and a lot of hustle and a lot of things happening and a lot of whatever, right? And you know, it’s time for that. So to me, being able to create and destroy and create and destroy and to use the destruction for creation to fuel all of that. And it’s a never-ending source of power. That to me really highlights how powerful the feminine is. And just how much that when we honor the feminine in each of us, we can then flow through life more easily. So all of these things like stress and burnout and adrenal fatigue and hypothalamic amenorrhea, and blunting and hormone problems and all of these things that happen as a result of overworking and all this stuff, then this kind of discussion can help tremendously because we understand that not everything can be Go Go Go and everything needs to be. And thank goodness that we have both at our disposal. But are we actually using it? Have we brought in as much flexibility and flow as we can to our lives? Most of us, I will say skew towards No, just because society is not necessarily set up for that it’s scheduled as nine to five that’s acuity, it’s Zoom meetings, it’s scheduled things, whatever. And it’s still worthwhile considering how much we are bringing this flow and the psychological truth to it. Because if that’s where our creativity and our power lies in that expression, well, gosh, it kind of behooves us to go seek that out and bring it more into our life so that it can be present. Because at the end of the day, we’re creating possibilities, which is what people really want, right? If potential creative potential merge with the unknown is unlimited possibilities, right? That’s kind of the equation. So as we begin to hear how much power the feminine has and how much it is a loving connection and relationship between feminine and masculine energy is designed to assist us and to uplift us in our lives and to get us to possibility and power and choice and vision and to actually get the results that we’re after. None of that is weak, right? The feminine is incredibly powerful in her own right. And as we begin to see that in ourselves and seek that we also then get to look around and say wow, I am creating the life that I want that I am able to get the results that I’m after. And I feel so proud of myself for having done that and for showing myself that I can do that. We will continue to build on this next time about what is masculine and highlight all the juicy stuff there. And then after we have defined everything, we will be able to go even further down into this series. So thank you so much for being here. Thank you for hanging out. Like I said, thank you so much for sending in your DMS and leaving comments and emailing and all of that on these subjects because I love hearing it so keep it up Have a wonderful day and I’ll talk to you next time